Christmas from a cat's point of view

It's a hard life being a cat. I have important things to do, eating, sleeping, getting my belly rubbed. I have no time for other things to be happening. It has been a stressful time the last few weeks. Thank goodness it is over.

It all started about a month ago. My two slaves Aileen and Dr. P came home with a big box. That was very kind of them, they know how I love big boxes. I investigated immediately and after ordering the slaves to open the box I found strange green plastic things inside. These were kind of fun to chew. The slave that strokes me started building a tree from the green plastic things. That was quite strange to say the least. So suddenly we have a green plastic tree in our living room and you'll never guess what they did next..... They started hanging little balls and long glittering ropes on it! So tasteless. The only thing looking good in a tree is a nice plump bird. Mind you, I did have fun hunting the angels on it. Indeed I caught one quite often.

Then there were the cards. Every day when the slaves come home I run and greet them and demand to be stroked. But suddenly they seemed more interested in checking the post when they got in and seeing if someone had sent them a card. Excuse the pun, but I felt disCARDed.... As revenge I knocked over as many cards as I could after they had been carefully placed on the sideboard. And not one person sent a card of a cat! We had dogs, penguins, polar bears, reindeer. Everything except a cat. I was a bit upset to say the least.

And then my slaves didn't leave in the morning! They just stayed at home, which I find very annoying. When was I meant to find some peace to sleep? The slave who strokes me then completely disappeared with her case. I was quite upset, I love that case! Luckily the slave that feeds me stayed and I made sure that she took over the duties of stroking as well. She actually disappeared for a long time too, she left me by myself one night! I made it clear the only route to forgiveness was posh cat food from Marks and Spencers..... And because I have trained her so well, she immediately did what I demanded.

Then chaos broke out. The slave who strokes me came back and the parents of the slave who feeds me came too! Oh my goodness, it was so exhausting. I got a present, which out of politeness, I played with (so I wouldn't hurt their feelings). I have to admit, I thought the chaos was never going to end... All I wanted was a bit of peace and quiet.

And then finally they listened to my demands. The two old ones left. Then the slave who strokes me started leaving for work. And finally today, the slave that feeds me left too! I am having the time of my life, sleeping, watching birds (in the real tree outside) and enjoying some tranquility. But the slaves better return by 7pm this evening to fulfill their stroking and feeding duties......